Magic Shake-Ball

Dear Magic Shake-Ball:

I fell asleep today while sitting on a backless stool.  Is there an Olympic category for someone with my particular talents?

Answer:

"Our remedies oft in ourselves do lie
Which we ascribe to heaven."
           (All's Well That Ends Well 1.1.218-219)

Interpretation:

Oh, yeah, baby. I can make my own destiny--just like Helena. Check me out in 2016: I'm going for the Gold in the Olympic Sleep Deprivation Balance Beam!