In honor of Exam time, I wanted to pay tribute to Biologist Mike Adams' brilliant study on the dangers of exam period to the health of grandmothers, or The Dead Grandmother/Exam Syndrome. It's a study whose coldly logical conclusion ("only orphans should be allowed to attend University") is worthy of Richard III himself. After all, he pulled a similar stunt when he convinced Anne to marry him even though he'd killed her father-in-law and her husband.
Anyone who has taught college students will recognize the genius of Adams' work, in particular his conclusion that family members literally worry themselves to death over their college-age relatives' exams, and that "there is a single "designated worrier" in each family who bears the brunt of the danger. The exceptionally high death rate among grandmothers (24 times greater than for grand fathers) suggests the latter explanation is correct. If not, then people from very small families would be well advised to discourage other family members from attending college, since the potential risk becomes excessive with so few members to share the danger."
So, please, students, don't just think about yourselves this Exam season. Think about poor Grandma. Tell her you've dropped out.
Let's be careful out there.
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