Friday, April 15, 2011

Homebaked Shakespeare

At some point in the past month, I'm fairly convinced that my now 11-year-old daughter drugged me and then got me to agree to hosting a birthday slumber party for 8 girls. I'm not going to lie: I'm terrified. Someone, I'm sure, will cry, feelings will get hurt, tweens will be bored and no one will sleep. lighten my mood, I thought I'd dive into the archives that Michelle and I keep stored in a secret location (see: Hamlet's lost letter to his mother) and check out how Shakespeare's parents hosted slumber parties.

Evites from the Archives

It's a Super Sweet 16 Slumber Party!

Where: Castle Elsinore
When: Saturday, April 16th, 5:00pm (lights out at 6:00pm SHARP!)

It's Ophelia's birthday! We'll play "pin the hymen on the whore," hands-only "Twister," and sing hymns. Please have your daughter bring a sleeping bag, bible, and most recently fitted chastity belt.

Hammy's turning 24!

Where: Castle Elsinore
When: Saturday, April 16th, 5:00pm

Come to my closet for a very special sleepover to celebrate my 24 years of motherhood! We'll eat jello out of a mold made from my pregnant body, drink homemade milkshakes, and share feelings! In lieu of a gift, please bring in a special memory about your mommy!

A verily merry and fantasticall birthday for Peaseblossom!

Where: The woods seven leagues outside of Athens
When: Saturday, April 16th, when the moon is full

Come into the woods for some rollicking fun! Wrestling matches, animal shows, and pin the tail on the ass! Parents--don't worry--EVERYONE sleeps at my slumber parties!

1 comment:

  1. good luck, babe. I'm feeling your pain. Check out NPR's OnPoint broadcast from today when you can - it's pretty darn shakespearishy...xoxo