One of our favorite bloggers, Shakespeare Geek, raises a very interesting question about Act IV of Hamlet: What the hell does Hamlet's letter to his mother say? We know only that it arrives with Hamlet's letter to Claudius, in which Hamlet tells him that his plan to ship him to England and have him killed did not work. Well, Everyday Shakespeare did some digging around, working all our Shakespeare connections. And, voila! We found it.
Mom,
Remember how you said that Step-Dad and I just needed a little more "guy time" together? Like we should go battle axe shopping or something?
Can I just say, you were so unbelievably wrong. 'Sblood, it's all about you all the time, isn't it? Hamlet, do you think I've gained weight since the wedding? Hamlet, what kind of flowers do you think Step-Dad would like strewn on our bed? Are these silk sheets too slutty?
Well, fatter-than-in-your-wedding-portrait Mom, chew on this: Step-Dad's letter to the English king gave orders for me to be killed when I got there. And I only came across it because I was looking for paper so that I could write and say how much I missed home. Hello, irony?
Nice choice, Mom. Way to go.
Pensively, Hamlet
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