Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Magic Shake-Ball



Dear Magic Shake-Ball:

What will it take to make Newt Gingrich go away? For good this time.

Answer:

By this account then, Margaret may win him,
For she's a woman to be pitied much.
Her sighs will make a batt'ry in his breast,
Her tears will pierce into a marble heart.
(3 Henry VI 3.1.35-38)

Interpretation:

Margaret of Anjou? The original tiger-hearted ball-buster wrapped in a woman's hide? I like the way you think, Shake-Ball. We need a woman who looks weak and pitiable on the outside, but who's a cold-hearted fighter on the inside. That second-wife interview was never going to cut it--you could tell she didn't have a killer instinct. Is this going to be a job for Callista? Can we find someone to lure Newt away from her for a little hanky-panky and then set the beast loose on him using all of her media savvy? You know she's the type to have saved all the evidence...

No comments:

Post a Comment