Magic Shake-Ball

Dear Magic Shake-Ball,

My kids will not eat a single thing I cook. They act like I'm trying to poison them. What should I do?

Best, Me


Magic Shake-Ball's Response:

"I pray thee, cease thy counsel,
Which falls into mine ears as profitless
As water in a sieve." (Much Ado About Nothing 5.1.4.5)

Interpretation:

Um, I'm actually asking you for advice. Let's try this again . . .

Magic Shake-Ball's Response:

"He said, sir, the water itself was a good healthy
water; but, for the party that owed it, he might
have more diseases than he knew for." (Henry IV part 2, 2.1.2-5)

Interpretation:

I asked about food, and here you are saying something about water! Even more, this is not H20 water, but pee. As in, Falstaff's urine. I don't know how to interpret this. Are you saying that only a drunk adult like Falstaff would eat what I cook? Sheesh, Shake-Ball, sometimes you just don't have my back . . .