Friday, October 28, 2011

Homebaked Shakespeare

It's that special time of year again when moms across the country either feel really crappy about themselves or really superior. You know what I'm talking about: Halloween. In honor of Michelle's and my commitment to making things as easy as possible for ourselves and other overworked moms, I'm recycling our post from last year's Errant Parent.


Halloween, as many of you beleaguered moms know, can be a walk of shame -- for you. It's the one day each year when all the "creative" mommies in the neighborhood get to strut their stuff. You know the ones we're talking about: the ladies who make their own, really unusual costumes for their kids and then act like it's no big deal. Like that "baby grand piano" outfit , or the "buttered popcorn" costume complete with individually hand-sewn buttered kernels. And then you feel even more like crap for buying the Ashley Tisdale High School Musical costume from Oriental Trading.

Well, this year you can be the smug Mommy on the block. We've come up with five simple, yet totally original, Shakespeare-themed costumes for your kids. We guarantee that they'll make you look creative and really well read.

Drowning Ophelia

Move over, Ariel! Just dip a fancy dress in cold water, and you're well on your way to creating this adorable Drowning Ophelia costume. All you need is a fishbowl filled with water, Saran Wrap to keep the water in, and a game little lady who knows how to use a snorkel!

Bearded Lady/Witch

Fair is foul, and foul is fair. Who wants to be a plain old witch when you can be one of the "Weird Sisters" -- the bearded witches who sport facial hair and terrorize men? When shocked creative Mommy asks you what's wrong with your little trick-or-treater, just flip open your Macbeth and read her Act 1, Scene 3.

King Richard III

My kingdom for a Snickers! If you have an old baby doll, you can make a convincing "withered" arm for this costume. Then, stuff your little guy with an extra shirt for a "hunchback," and top it off with a crown and beard. If he's game, give him a shoe lift for that "uneven legs" look.

Macbeth and Lady Macbeth

"Is this a dagger that I see before me?" This scary couples costume is perfect for a brother and sister pair with a flair for the morbid.

Recreate Macbeth's famous dagger speech with some duct tape, and give the Mommies something to talk about with Lady M.'s bloody baby handprints. Out, out damn spot!

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