Friday, September 23, 2011

Homebaked Shakespeare

Failed Ideas From the Archives of Shakespeare-Inspired Products and Taglines

*Gloucester Jellied Eye Candies*—"Betcha Can't Eat Just One!"

*Gonerilla Juice* (later ditched for Clamato)— "So good, it's infectious!"

*The Lady Macbeth Pump In Style*—"Giving Milk For Gall Since 1040 A.D. !"

*Hotel Othello*—"We'll Leave the Light On For You...If You're Very, Very Good and Never Look at or Speak to Anyone But Your Husband. "

*Candied Hamlet*—"Funeral-Bak'd Meats Never Tasted This Good!"

*Titus' EasyBake Oven*—"Home-Baked Pies Just Like Mom Used to Make"

*My Little Crook-Back Pony*—"My Kingdom For A Horse!"

*King Richard's Tower of Fun Day-Care*—"Where Kids Can Be Kids. Forever. And ever."

1 comment:

  1. Particularly excellent, even by your high standards!