Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Ask the Experts

“I’m having 20 people over for Thanksgiving Dinner. I’ve never hosted Thanksgiving before and am very nervous about it. Do you have any tips?”
--Suzanne R. (Portsmouth, NH)

Lady Capulet (Juliet's mother): First of all, go over that guest list with a fine toothed comb! Don’t agree to have your daughter’s boyfriend over, no matter how sweet she says he is. He could be a punk kid from a bad family.

Lady Macbeth: I’d say pay attention to the food. We had a a terrible incident one year when my husband ate some bad pork roulade. Food poisoning just did a number on him. Before we even got to the main course, he was babbling and screaming like a maniac. He thought I had invited dead people to the dinner! Obviously, I had no idea what he was talking about. Threaten the caterers or do whatever you need to do, but believe you me that food must be fresh.

Gertrude (Hamlet): Here’s my two cents. If you have guests that like to drink, consider setting some ground rules. For example, no one can bring up old grudges and no one can talk about their sex life—or anyone else’s. Conversation should be kept light and pleasant.

Titania (Fairy Queen, Midsummer Night's Dream): Speaking of drinking, don’t pass out at the table. I’m not saying that your guests are going to try anything funny, but you never know about these things. We tend to have a non-traditional Thanksgiving, but I still like to set some limits. Tricking the hostess into having sex with an animal is simply not cool.

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