Homebaked Shakespeare

By King Richard III, on location at the MLA Convention

Yes, I know. I've been a bit leaden-footed in my postings. But think ye not I was meant to be late? After all, I was born with teeth and hair. I like to take my time before hastily jumping into things. That said, I did carouse a bit too wildly this weekend at the MLA convention. It's a dirty job homing in on people's insecurities, luring them into one's confidence, and then getting them soused so that one can post incriminating video of them on youtube and destroy their chances at academic advancement. But somebody's go to do it.

My favorite cocktail for making all of this happen? See below.

The MLA Immolator 
(otherwise known as the Seneca Falls Hotel Clarence's* Flaming Rum Punch) 

*Drink master's note: Not all Clarences are angels, and it's only a wonderful life if you're too lazy to screw it up for everyone.

1 ounce 151-proof rum 
1½ ounce white rum 
large splash fresh orange juice 
large splash pineapple juice (equal to orange juice) 
splash cherry brandy 
splash grenadine 
orange wedge, for rimming glass 
sugar, for rimming glass 

Ingredients of note: The 151-proof rum contains a lot of alcohol (75.5 percent). It’s there to produce a flame that caramelizes the sugar on the rim. In doing so, much of the alcohol will burn off. The second shot of rum should be 80 proof, or 40 percent alcohol. 

One more thing: It’s important to use a tempered (heat-resistant) glass. The glass will heat up while the flame is burning, then cool down rapidly when you add ice.