My question for the experts tonight is, am I doomed here? I mean, I look out over the cast of Shakespeare's characters and all I come up with for middle children are Regan and Richard III. And they aren't exactly what I'd call well adjusted, happy people. Thoughts?
Hamlet: I don't understand the premise of your question. Who are you, and why are you interrupting my thoughts?
Ophelia: Of course you don't understand! Why would you? You're just the kind of selfish only child that she's talking about!
Hamlet: Oh, give it a rest. You're not a middle child, you're a youngest. So cut the crap.
Regan: Yeah. Listen, blondie, you don't know shit about being a middle. I ripped out a guys eyeballs and I'm still the sister no one remembers.
Ophelia: Wait--aren't you Goneril's sister? Goneril is so cool!
Regan: Why? What did she ever do?
Ophelia: I don't know, but I want to follow her around and wear her clothes.
Regan: Aahhhhhhhh!
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